When was the last time you laughed so hard, you cried? For me, it's seems like ages ago.
Usually every 6 months or so, the stresses, anxiety, heartache, guilt, sin and everything else, get all balled up inside and leave a tremendous weight on my shoulders. For me, it's usually released by either a.) going to confession or b.) crying it out. Having barely stepped foot in a church in almost 2 years and not having a good cry since Ginger was born, something was bound to break... soon.
Last night, it did.
Before going to bed last night, I quickly scanned through some of my favorite online spots. Unbeknownst to me, my friend Tyler posted a video on his Facebook page. Usually I bypass things like this because, more often than not, they're never worth it. But Tyler, who has a great sense of humor, commented on how he couldn't stop watching it. Now keep in mind, it's almost midnight and Scott is sound asleep (snoring in fact) on the floor below me.
I proceeded to click on the video...
Now, perhaps some of you think it's silly, or stupid, or are offended that someone would portray their child in this manner, but I on the other hand realized it was just what I needed. A humongous dose of therapy.
I was laughing so hard, I was crying... balling! The tears were continually rolling down my face. I couldn't catch my breath. My eyes were like two slits with barely enough room to see what was happening. I even woke up Scott! I laughed for minutes after it was over... and then I watched it again!
For me, it was the release I was needing. Now, I know that having a good cry like this doesn't absolve me of my sins, or erase the fact that what I really should do is go to church, but it helped me experience something that has been lacking as of late, and desperately needed to come out.
I've decided to bookmark this video for those days when I'm missing the silly times with my sisters, when the rain just won't go away, when the kids are driving me nuts, or maybe for those times when all I need is a good chuckle.